there's always something going on...

hi hi~ i'm back! well felt that i've been rotting at home so decided to write something here at least? LOL... lately doesn't feel right to go out of house so stayed at home rotting all day... choose this song for the day "life is like a boat" felt that it really suit the mood i am in now... nobody truly understand me nor know anything much about me... my smiles have cover all? putting up a happy looking mask was uncomfortable and tiring... only loneliness existed in me which made my anger shows easily... i understand how much pain it was for being lonely... i've understand it all and i'm moving forward to for someone who will give me a chance to understand me... i would give my heart and everything i got for the only "you"... everything that no others could and i would be the best you've ever seen... enough of that >.< later taking exam hope my brain would work well... my brain store so much but didn't actually have the time to look back at everything...

Days weeks month and finally 4 years, it still going on and on.
those lonely day i passes by, only chill of cold to my heart.
there a part of me that can't let everything go, for the past i've been through.
thing are getting too much for my hand, thing were slipping through my finger.
time was still ticking, i'm still chasing after but still losing to it.
i'm exhausted from chasing so i've stopped, giving myself a little rest.
i'll be going on after when i found someone, someone who to go after with.
i would stick with my partner, as long as she won't give up upon me.
now i'm just under the tree waiting, waiting for that somebody to pass-by.
neither any of them has given me chance nor understanding, i'm just plain waiting.
one day someone like "her" would pass by, it'd be soon i believe in...


Life is like a boat lyrics:

Nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before
And if I ever need someone to come along
Who's gonna comfort me and keep me strong

We are all rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on comin' and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day

Tookude iki wo shiteru toumei ni nattamitai
Kurayami ni omoe takedo mekaku shisarete tadake
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made

Nobody knows who I really am
Maybe they just don't give a damn
But if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me, and keep me strong

Hito no kokoro wa utsuri yuku nukedashita kunaru
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo tsureteku

And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore

Oh, I can see the shore
When will I... see the shore?

I want you to know who I really am
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you
And if you ever need someone to come along
I will follow you, and keep you strong

Tabi wa mada tsudzuiteku odayakana hi mo
Tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de fune wo terashidasu
Inori wo sasagete atarashii hi wo matsu
Azayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made

And every time I see your face,
The oceans heave up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars,
And soon I can see the shore

Unmei no fune wo kogi
Nami wa tsugi kara tsugi e to
Watashitachi wo osou kedo
Sore mo suteki na tabi ne
Dore mo suteki na tabi ne

Anger? hate? Neither...

hihi HI! hahaz... i think i would never be able to hold hate or anger for that long... a day passes and poof~ anger disappear... i'm too much forgiving and understanding? this are which nobody believes that i was... people thoughts are getting more and more complicated? even i forgiven a person, that person would think i was only faking it... i've understand a person feeling , that person would think that i was just trying to be mature... this place is totally gone complicated as days passes... so damn tire of getting someone to understand me... and hope just a girl that would believe whom i really was... well with those hopes i felt lonely again >.< ah arhh~ just want to have a simple life where there's simple love that no lie, secret and objections... so worn out here sleeping more and more hoping the next day would be different... yet it doesn't just happen... require a warm hug and a pat on the back... just to cheer up myself? LOL... can't help myself for that either... can't think of who to blame for the current century we're in... not the girls or the boys, nor what's right and what's wrong... hmm read jia yi poem LOL~ can't understand what she written there... well i thought of something i felt it's lame... it's about how girls judge guy who love them? LOL~

when guys follow them:
stranger => Stalker/Pervert
guys they hate => Stalker
guys friend => friend only
guys they like => he like her
god brother => my brother only ma~
boyfriend => natural...